This was sent to me by a friend. No doubt, she and her children are still dealing with pain from what has been done. I ask that you pray with me that healing will begin in their lives as they try to put their lives back together again. There are so many testimonies like these that show others, there is a way of escape from the pain you are dealing with.
Below this line was NOT written by me. Given to me by a friend who has given me permission to share. (Daniel)
July 22, 2020
As I lay here the last night I will fall asleep as a married woman, I start reminiscing over the last 9 years of my life. I remember the day we said “I do”. How we fought to be together but made it work. The few that chose to be at our wedding but it was perfect. The dinner, the cake, the black frosting that stained our fingers and lips. You dad was still with us then. Our move to Virginia, the hell we endured there, but we made it work.
The next part of our journey the beach we called our home. The business the rules and regulations, the ink everywhere shirts piled high and only 2 people to do the work, but we made it work. The death of your father, the graduation of my daughter, every anniversary and Mother’s Day, every Fathers Day, the kids birthdays. The horrible landlord we had and the nosey neighbors. The sound of owls at night and birds singing in the morning. Deadlines to meet and designs to push out but among all the things, we made it work. The next big chapter was supposed to be the final one.
The biggest move of all. From Virginia to Texas. Uprooting my children, traveling 4 days with 3 dogs to a place where we had not even found our house yet. The hotel, the scammer lady, the Christmas that felt like the biggest disappointment ever but we made it work. We did it because we were together. Even if we had arguments we knew we could count on one another. I knew you always had a back up plan. I believed you could make anything happen, that’s what you always had shown me.
I’d like to thank you for a few things. I’d like to thank you first for drilling in me from the very beginning how big you were on trust. That even not answering a question could still be a lie, that if we couldn’t trust each other then we had nothing. Honesty, truth, deception you made me realize what all those things were and how to either embrace them and make them a part of me and who I was, or to make sure I steered clear of it. Thank you for that, thank you so much. Had it not been for your constant reminder of what honesty was and what truth meant and what deception meant, I probably would not have been onto you.
You see I knew there was something up, I just couldn’t put my finger on it. But I had known you when you were true and honest. I knew you when you would try to deceive me over a gift but you weren’t good at hiding them because you used to not be good at deception. It wasn’t in your blood. But when my spirit, my woman’s intuition kicked in, when my mothers instinct kicked in I knew to trust my gut.
What happened to you?
Where did you lose your way?
What made you feel it was ok to assault a 15 year old child for 4 years?
What made it so easy for you to instill fear of being without a home, without money, without me if she told? How’d you become so good at hiding money I needed for my medicine? If there was nothing to hide why did you remote erase computers from the back of a cruiser? You see all the things you drilled into me as wonderful traits of a woman, were the exact things you turned your back on. The things I listed are just a very small fraction of all the unmentionable, unimaginable things you’ve done. But thank you.
Thank you for making me the woman I am tonight. The woman who knew what the right thing was to do, the woman who was true to the very end. The woman will hold you accountable . You see you May think we couldn’t possibly live without you, but it’s quite the opposite. We haven’t lost anything. We’ve gained respect for one another, we’ve gained openness and honesty and trust us 5 we have. We have never been more transparent and I owe that to you. Because of what you have done, my kids know what not to look for in a mate, they know what to look for when something seems off, and they know that I will Always be there for them no matter what you tried to say about me. You gave them their real mother back.
I hate what you did, despicable, disgusting and a sin. But in the midst of it all IM BACK! I’m a fighter, a strong fierce woman who can and will handle everything life tries to throw at me. So once again between your moments of lust and greed, and my moments of clarity and drive, and because of the bravery of my child…we made it work! What was always meant to be, is. I hope you find God. I hope he still has mercy on your soul. I hope you instill into yourself what you instilled in me as my husband.
I hope you truly learn what truth is, what honesty means and what it really means to keep your word. Perhaps you will one day, I know I have. I was true to the absolute end and now that it’s here, I couldn’t be more free! I feel like the lightest person on earth. I don’t have to fear for my children’s safety, I don’t have to wonder if your lying or hiding something. I don’t have to answer to a narcissistic hypocrite anymore. I have learned that I am normal! I am not crazy, and that my childhood was just fine! Sorry yours probably was the reason you turned out the way you did. I’m choosing to keep my last name.
There was a man, his name was Mike. He was true, he was honest, he was what it meant to be a true Christian and SOLEY because of him, do we feel extremely proud to carry the Bower last name, for no other other reason other than because he is no longer with us, he deserves to have someone with his last name who is honest and truthful and strives to live by the principles he so strongly believed in and upheld. July 23,2020 the end of a 9 year chapter. Just a tiny amount of time compared to the rest of the lifetime that I and my children have left to write in the series called Life. We’ve already begun and it’s starting out so great. Myself, my children…WE made it work.
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